2012: Zombie Apocalypse
For the second month in a row I found that there was nothing really new or exciting that I wanted to watch. Instead, I looked through my back-up list and picked the one with the highest star rating on Netflix. Surprisingly (or unsurprisingly, based on its competition), that movie was 2012: Zombie Apocalypse, a made for SyFy Channel movie starring Ving Rhames and Crab Man from My Name is Earl. The story is pretty standard: survivors of the zombie apocalypse trek across a wasted landscape trying to reach a safe zone.
THE GOOD: The best thing you could say about 2012 is that it’s decent. Story and acting are acceptable. Ving Rhames was great in the Dawn of the Dead remake. This attempt to recapture that glory is definitely better than his first: the terrible Day of the Dead remake.
THE BAD: SyFy movies are known for their extreme campiness. Outside of a giant zombie tiger, 2012 plays it straight. Unfortunately, this makes it a bit boring. There’s nothing original or humorous (intentional or unintentional) here, which makes it pretty forgettable in the long run.
THE ZOMBIES: Standard zombies. There’s an intro that talks about how zombieism spread, but it doesn’t really matter. There are hints that the virus is evolving some, as animals start to become infected and zombies start to set traps, but there’s not a tremendous amount of time given to this and that subplot never really goes anywhere. Some of the zombies in the film look pretty bad, as if some of them put on a Halloween clown mask and slapped some fake gore on it.
VERDICT: Uninspired and unoriginal. Your life will be unaltered whether you check it out or not, I’d lean toward skipping it. Grade: C
Current ZMN Rank: #80 out of 136
Golden Zombey Watch: Ving Rhames for Best Actor? Sure, why not? The zombie tiger might qualify for WTF Moment.
Dead and Deader
Next up, my brother chose the 2006 smash hit, Dead and Deader, starring Dean Cain and Guy Torry (best known as the prisoner who helped un-racistify Edward Norton in American History X). Cain is actually our second Superman found in Zombie Movie Night (Henry Cavill in Blood Creek being the first). Somebody give a shout out if they know of a zombie movie starring Adam West!
Cain is the main character and is quickly killed in a military mission gone awry. To everyone’s surprise, he wakes up alive, as do his fellow military men. He seems to be the only one with any consciousness though, and he sets out on a mission to stop the other, mindless zombies.
THE GOOD: DaD was actually pretty enjoyable. I was surprised. There’s some cheesiness, but for the most part it’s well-acted, sometimes funny, and overall entertaining.
THE BAD: I’m never a fan of zombie super powers. It just doesn’t make sense to me. Why would the zombie Dean Cain have super-tracking senses, super strength, and advanced healing?
THE ZOMBIES: Cain has the aforementioned super powers, but the other guys all seem to be standard zombies. Zombieism is caused by some kind of mutant scorpion and there ends up being a mad scientist behind the whole thing.
VERDICT: I was pleasantly surprised with this one. I think it’s worth checking out, especially if you’re a huge Dean Cain fan (my wife might be the only one left, though). Grade: B
Current ZMN Rank: #56 out of 136
Golden Zombey Watch: The main 3 characters might compete for the acting categories or Cain might show up in Outstanding Zombie. Pretty decent contender for Best Zombie Comedy as well.